Monday, April 18, 2011
Trying to understand and accept
Well, my prayer request was NOT answered :( I'm sorry St. Jude, but I feel let down. Yeah, yeah, I'm supposed to accept the situation and have faith that something better for me is on the horizon. Honestly, I feel shattered. C broke up with me and the whole situation of the past month, how it came out of the blue after such a loving and wonderful year...blindsided me. So now more pain, more suffering, more just getting through the day with no joy in my heart. I'm back taking antidepressants and antianxiety just to get through the day. Is this what God wants? What is the lesson in all of this? I'm sorry I'm not feeling very thankful. Hopefully, I will see the light...but I really thought this union was blessed by God, and sent by God...my final reward for all the heart pain I've suffered in relationships. I guess what I ask for now is to please take C out of my mind and heart. I feel like a shell, just going through the motions. If you could tell me what I need to know about this, that would be great. Thank you.
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